Every Last Kiss

Page 33

“You’re never going to believe who’s here,”she breathed.

From her tone, however, it was actually pretty easy to guess.I looked across the crowded room to find Derek standing with a group of his friends.It wasn’t painful at all to see him, I realized with a jolt. I didn’t feel anything for him.Not even anger.Strange.

I shrugged my shoulders at Jenn and went back to picking at my Lo Mein.But Derek had spotted me.When I looked up again, he was almost to our table.I groaned, but met his eyes as he approached.He was alone- he had left his friends congregated across the room.I could feel them watching, just as I could feel Jenn and Jess holding their breaths for my reaction.

“Macy, can we talk?”he asked hesitantly, his face hopeful and afraid at the same time.

His class ring sparkled on his finger as he thrummed it nervously against his skinny leg. I couldn’t believe that I had ever thought he was beautiful.He was cute, in a pale toddler-sort-of-way, but he was nowhere near Hasani’s level of devastatingly good looks.

“What about?”I asked brightly.Jenn choked on her egg roll and I shot her a look.

“You know what about,”he responded patiently.“Could we speak alone?”He gestured toward a nearby table, but I made no move to get up.

“I’m good here,”I replied, smiling at him politely.“I don’t have anything to say.”

“Macy, please,”he begged.“Please don’t throw away two years over this.Please.”

His light green eyes met mine and he gave me a heartbreaking look.But I found that it didn’t break my heart.Mine had been broken by a situation much bigger, much more important than this trivial bullshit.

Looking at him steadily, I replied firmly, “I’m not the one who threw away two years, Derek.You did.I hope that you and Tara are very happy together.”

Breaking our gaze, I went back to my food dismissively, making a point of pushing it around on my plate and not looking at him again.

“Macy…”he began, but Jenn interrupted him with an acerbic tongue.

“You should go now, Derek,”she instructed sharply.“Macy is done with you.Say hi to your new girlfriend for us.”

Jenn and Jess collapsed into giggles and he glared at them angrily before he stalked away.Jess stared at me incredulously.

“I guess smashing all of his things and delivering them to his doorstep was more cathartic than I realized,”she grinned.

I couldn’t help but smile back.My heart was still broken, but it wasn’t because of Derek.For all I cared, he and Tara Wilson could get married and have twenty kids together.He was nothing to me.

My thoughts were consumed by another face... a beautiful, darkly handsome face framed by long shiny hair.I inhaled sharply at the memory and Jess’ perceptive eyes flew to my face.

“Are you okay?Was it too soon to joke?”Worry creased her fine features.

“No,”I shook my head.“Derek is the joke.It’s fine.”

Even though I loved these girls, I found myself desperately missing Cleopatra.She would understand- I wouldn’t even have to explain.I sighed a heavy sigh and continued eating my noodles.

* * *

Days turned into weeks.Non-eventful, unexciting weeks.My thoughts frequently returned wistfully to Alexandria, missing the sharp tang of the sea air and the fragrance of the jasmine.I managed to conveniently forget the drawbacks of ancient Egyptian life- including the lack of electricity, plumbing and modern medicine.Oh- and the crazy eunuch who had wanted to kill me.

On one restless afternoon, I went back to the mall alone and found a perfume store where they created custom perfume oil.I tried to recreate the perfume that I wore in Alexandria- the soft, subtle scent that had made me feel so sexy. The perfume maker managed to get close, even if it wasn’t exactly the same.But it was close enough to remind me of Egypt every time I inhaled it.  

I also managed to find a tattoo artist that specialized in henna… and I had a phoenix tattooed on my back, just like I wore in Alexandria. My mother almost had a heart attack until she realized that henna tattoos were temporary and would wear off in a matter of weeks.

I all but ignored Derek at swim practice, something that at first troubled him, then later pissed him off.He had conveniently forgotten that he was the one who had erred, the back-stabbing cheater.In his mind now, I was being a bitch.Perception is a strange thing. And surprise, surprise.Within a month, Tara Wilson was wearing his class ring on her short orange finger.Puke.

Ever since she had divorced my dad, my mom had become ultra-sensitive to break-ups, in part because of her psychiatrist friends.She bought a stack of self-help books to help me deal with the grief of losing a relationship, thinking that I was depressed over Derek.It was a logical, if inaccurate, assumption.

Little did she know that my lingering, all-consuming sadness stemmed from losing Hasani, Cleopatra and Antony in a previous life. That would have been a little impossible to explain. It would also have resulted in me being harnessed into a straight-jacket. But whatever- that was a moot point because I would never say a word.

My mom was trying her best to be understanding and was being incredibly patient with everything around the house.I had forgotten to pick up my ice cream bowl the other night and she had gritted her teeth and simply smiled at me.That part was nice because she was usually a little OCD about things like that.

After school let out for the summer, though, it was harder to keep my mind off of everything.Without school to occupy my thoughts, I decided to channel my sadness into writing.It seemed to be fairly therapeutic.One July morning, I was lounging at home writing poetry about an unnamed handsome warrior when my phone rang.

Picking it up, I saw that it was my mom, calling from her office.

“Hi mom,”I answered absently, scribbling down another line.His eyes melted into the darkness as he hovered above me and smiled.

“Hi sweetie.Could you do me a huge favor?I left my cell phone on the kitchen counter.Could you bring it to me?I feel naked without it.”